Nervousness as an inspiration

I recently made a decision to finally commit to a date for my long anticipated workshop.  At least long anticipated in my life.  I was nervous as I made this commitment to my team.  I needed materials, back-up, a website, and follow-up complete before I put myself out there.  I have benefitted by putting myself out there before, but not in a pay for play individual selling for the workshop.  I'm happy to report that I have flipped it.  I have flipped the nervousness to excitement.  As I went through the flip it exercise of imagining a greater future where two times a week I roll out of bed, walk, and facilitate, moderate, and coach 45 people through an amazing one day workshop that has already changed my world.  I love it, I'm great at it, and I know the value is there.  So I look forward to this if it were up to me imagining this greater future.

Include Yourself

I feel great sadness when I see someone who's not included. When I don't feel included. When I feel alone. I've worked hard to include others in my life, almost to the extent of excluding myself. What do I mean by that? I'm looking too much outside, so sometimes I ignore the inside. I absolutely seek to be heard and have a chance to speak. And I'm learning as I'm creating a safe space with others and practicing that, I'm learning how to have a safe space with myself. What if I include myself in my thoughts, fears, dreams, what if I listened -- what if I don't beat myself up for dreaming, or being afraid. I feel a key to community is to include others. It starts with me. I'm including myself. I'm Bob Shenefelt.   This is iMatter.


When have faith and limits occurred at the same time in your life?

The two words faith and limit seem to me wouldn't be in the same sentence.
Faith to me is an all knowing, a belief. Limits are places where things stop, structure, boundaries. Recently I had a conversation with my Dr. and the message was I need to accept that I have limits. I can only do so much. I cannot change the world by myself. I cannot do all of the things I did 30 years ago. And having faith that it's all going to work out anyway.

A Bit of a Conundrum

I woke up early this morning in a bit of a conundrum. I'm very excited about the things that lie ahead, the day that's about to unfold and at the same time, I am very fearful. What if the things I'm working on aren't of value to people, aren't of value to me. What if I'm making a big mistake. On the other side, my gut has told me to do this for many years and its become clearer and clearer and the synchronicities have grown immensely. It's nearly magical, and yet there's this fear. How do I work through this conundrum. The iMatter mindset is to listen to the questions in my head, the conversation going in my head.

Praying at Church

A lot of people talk about praying at church, praying to God. That is awesome. For me, it's more like having a conversation with something greater than myself, to say thank you, universe; thank you, God; Thank you, Dad; thank you, whoever is up there supporting me; thank you for being there. Also, for putting me in that conversation. Bob, thank you for being there. I believe we have a part and a say in who we are and what's coming next. Yes there is karma, yes there are destiny type things that I believe at least a small piece of that we actually help to create.

Father's Day

As Father's Day approaches, I'm excited to spend the day with my kids, and at the same time very sad that my father is not around. This is the first Father's Day I've had without my father physically being here. It sucks. As we were talking about death with our kids last summer, I was explaining how Simba's father said to Simba, that he is actually there for him even if not physically, maybe even more now than in the past. He's there to remind Simba who he is. He's there to be confided in. He's watching down on him. He's helping create synchronicities. As

Use People

Use people? It may sound a little selfish or a bit abusive to talk about using people, but hear me out.  This isn't using people to my advantage and to their disadvantage.  It's using people to mirror the lessons I need. I use people by asking them for help. I use people by asking them to call me out when I'm not on my path of doing what I say I'm going to do.

Five Minute Nap

I have never been able to get the desired eight hours of uninterrupted sleep I hear so much about. In the past, I would get upset because I would often wake up at 3:00 or 4:00 or 5:00 in the morning. I might be thinking about things or have to go to the bathroom, and then my mind starts going, and I'm awake. I used to get mad and worried about being tired in the morning.  I would be frustrated that I couldn't sleep, and that I was thinking and exaggerating all of those things in my head.


Nearly every day I take a few minutes to check in, to see where my head is at, and to see where my heart is at.  I check in deep, I breathe, I see what bubbles to the surface around what matters most to me, today.  Then I take a few minutes to think about my top three action items.  We have had great conversations about why only three? What kind of action items? How does one prioritize three out of the 50 to 100 things I need to get done today?  The shift for me has been to look at those top three as the important things.

Curse or Blessing?

Curse or blessing?  Which do you choose?  Which do I choose?  The other day, someone commented to me that they've had enough perceived bad luck lately, and that it almost seemed like there was a curse. When are things going to go right?   It got me thinking.  Recently, as often happens in life, there have been a few frustrating events.  My daughter didn't get a part in the play that she thought she would, I broke my hand, and we didn't get an account I thought we were going to get.

What Am I?

In the past, I would often wake up with a huge list of to-dos and/or meetings that I didn't really want to be a part of.  I would dread the day, and sure enough what I put out to the world is what I got back:  a boring, dreadful day.  In iMatter, we help people go from Am I, to I Am. As I started to realize who I am, there was a sense of peace. There was a sense that I was putting energy into the person I am.  A huge revelation came to me not too long ago, that I am a writer.  I used to think:  “who am I to say I'm a writer?  I can't write.  What do I have to write about?”  That's the chatter that was going on in my head. 

The Bully In Me

There is a lot of talk these days about bullies in school and bullying happening to teenagers.   Recently, I realized that I am one of the biggest bullies that I know.  Not to others, but toward myself. I'm a very kind person, and I don't think I bully anyone, other than the conversation happening in my head. That may be my ego, it may be my conscience, it could be the self-doubt in my head. I find often it is a one-way conversation coming from my ego, and it's often telling me: you never do this, you always do that, you should do this, you should do that, and there must be a better way.

Positive World View

Marianne Williamson states, we can choose our world view.  If my world view is negative and that things are not going to work out, that's what is going to happen.  If my world view is positive, and I have faith to know things are going to work out, then they usually do.  The universe will prove us right.  What I put out, I get back.  It's a giant copy machine.  It's like a boomerang.  I put out that positive energy, that gratitude, that faith, that things are going to work out.