It starts with me, and it's not all about me.

BY BOB SHENEFELT

 

“It starts with me, and it's not all about me.”  

The theme, the motto, the rallying cry for character education lead by iMatter for Kids, is “it starts with me”. I can blame others, but it doesn't do me much good.  I can deflect the accountability and responsibility, I can push it off, I can judge.  I can't control those things; it's a waste of energy to put too much into those things outside of me.  What I can control is who I am, and how I choose to show up right now.  Yes, life brings about situations, frustrations, and it sure is easy to point the finger at someone else.  Real growth in myself, in this world, is about having the courage to make that choice, to take a stand, to show up, and to admit that maybe I had some role in that drama.  To take the responsibility, and the drive and commitment to declare “it starts with me”.  Taking ownership of that is scary.  What if I fall?  What if I fail?  What if I'm wrong?  That's life, man.  Simply making the choice that “it starts with me”, and have that mentality and that thought process, is a huge step in the growth of an individual, of a group, of a community, of our world.

The second part is, “it's not all about me”. There are times when I feel myself getting angry or judgmental, when someone I have a connection with is being vulnerable and on edge when they’re speaking to me.  It’s easy for me to get sucked into their drama.  If I can hold the space for them, to honor their trust in that moment, it can be a learning opportunity.  I can choose not to judge, or jump in and get emotionally involved. Take a deep breath, and realize that this is about them, man.  Be there for them.  Stand there, hold the space.  Honor the faith and the trust.  

Two keys to changing the world - It starts with me.  It's not all about me.

peace,

bob